Being Real…
So I have had plenty to blog about these days, yet just haven’t really had the interest nor taken the time. But this has been on my mind for a couple of weeks so I thought I’d share…
Have you ever watched a baby fall asleep, or even at that a three year old? Have you noticed they don’t close their eyes and then fall asleep like we do? Why? Why do they have to be in the know at all times? Why do they care so much? Do they feel like they are going to miss out on a precious piece of life? I know without a doubt my kids feel 100 percent secure and loved so it can’t be out of fear, so why is it? I still don’t know, but it has got me thinking. Thinking of my life, and how so many times I hold on to what I care so deeply about and with all my being try to protect it. Why is it so hard for me to let go and trust God in trials that come my way? It is so easy to say you trust him, but until you are tested you never know how much you really do give to him. So needless to say, I am being tested right now. Every time our son has a surgery come up, my mind begins to race with so many emotions! So many why’s, when’s and how’s! This will be his seventh surgery and it truly breaks my heart to see him go through this! I know the situation could be worse and trust me I do count my blessings! But as a parent you just want to wrap your arms around them and never let go! So to add to this, my daughter has had a few moments of a crackling voice the last few weeks. In fact tonight her cry scared me so bad that I ran to her room and just held her for hours. Now in no way am I confessing she has this, but it has allowed fear to set in. So with a heavy heart tonight I opened my Bible and read this:
Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. James 1:2-5
I love how scripture can just hit you like a ton of bricks! Consider it pure joy, is a life’s lesson I’m sure, but perseverance is key right now in my life and in my sons! This past year has been tough on our family but so far we have persevered and have grown stronger! So with all that said I would encourage you to close your eyes and let go of whatever you may be holding on to!
3 comments May 6, 2008
Sneak peak…
Here’s a sneak peak of some adorable pictures my friend Emily took. You can also look at Liz’s blog, she took some great shots of my kids too!
Add comment March 5, 2008
Dad is great…
Do you remember the song, Dad is great…feeds me chocolate cake, sung by Bill Cosby? Well my kids could have been singing that song tonight. I left for my life group tonight and before I left I told Ryan what I had prepared for him and the kids, all he had to do was heat it up. So when I got home I ask, “how was dinner, did you and the kids like it?” His response, “all Juliana would eat was chips.” My response, “what did you try?” ……..His response, “chips!” Same story for Noah, however I did find a trace of peanut butter and jelly along with graham crackers and milk. So much for my “organic meal!” Dad is great though! It was nice to get out of the house and enjoy some adult conversation with other women!
2 comments March 5, 2008
Organic – To buy or not to buy…
I don’t know about you, but I certainly have a hard time deciding when to spend the extra cash on organic and when not to. Some of you buy all organic products, but if you are like me, you want to know the most important ones. These are twelve most important foods to buy organic, according to Missy Chase Lapine, The Sneaky Chef. Peaches, Strawberries, Apples, Spinach, Nectarines, Celery, Pears, Cherries, Potatoes, Sweet bell peppers, Raspberries and Imported grapes. These twelve have been found by the USDA to have the most amount of pesticide residue.
2 comments March 4, 2008
Gotta love Grandpa!
Noah and Grandpa have really bonded lately! It’s cute to see him get so excited when Grandpa comes over. Today they were playing baseball together and Noah was making Grandpa get the balls after he hit them. While Grandpa was collecting the balls Noah was cheering him on…”you can do it Grandpa…great job!” My kids are very blessed to have such a loving and caring Grandpa!
Add comment March 1, 2008
A Daddy’s Love…
What an amazing feeling it is to know that my daughter has the best Daddy in the whole world! It’s so comforting to know that she will feel loved and accepted by a man her whole life, that no matter what choices she may choose he will always love her and be there for her!
Looking back to my childhood, I missed out on this kind of love. I always wanted to be a Daddy’s girl. One that got to wear the t-shirt, make the chocolate chip pancakes for the banquet and go to the Father – Daughter dance. I always wanted to be able to run to my Daddy and be assured that in his arms was the safest place on earth. To be able to bring anything to the table and know my answer or guidance would be with great wisdom and love.
I know that I have always been loved by my “real” Dad, he says to this day that I’m his little girl. But the reality is, that little girl is not little anymore. That his addictions and hurt has paved twenty years away. I really feel for him at times, because he doesn’t even have a glimpse of what a wonderful life of which he could have been a part.
My Step Dad loved and cared for me as well, he did his very best to provide and raise me. Was it the very best? No, but it was his best. He has a lot of great qualities and has taught me many lessons about life. But he as well came from a broken past and unfortunately couldn’t leave it there. He couldn’t grasp on to the goodness of God, that ultimately God does have plan A for his life and that he can be whole. I know we all have been broken at times and hurt beyond belief, but there comes a time where you really have to let go and really forgive.
I am so fortunate that I learned how to let go at such an early age. I knew my “real” Dad was sick and I released him from my life when I was ten. It wasn’t an easy choice, but I feel it was the best I could have made. In the last seventeen years I’ve had contact with him three times and I’m proud to say that in every conversation I’ve told him that I love him and that I forgave him. I’ve also told him that when he gets his life together I’d love to start over…it’s now been seven years since I’ve spoken to him.
So this post started out with just Juliana and Ryan in mind and then some how got twisted with sappiness! So with all that said, it brings tears to my eyes knowing that my daughter has all she could have dreamed of and more in her Daddy!
7 comments February 29, 2008
